We parked the bridal car into the bride home's front porch. Waiting dashingly there was YJ, SY's younger brother. As dictated by tradition, he opened the car door for yours truly, I handed him a red packet and he in return, passed me some fruits before I stepped out of the car. The sun was just rising and it was a glorious morning indeed. While the other 'heng tais' gathered and readied themselves for 'battle', the photographers were busy snapping and shooting away. We then marched towards the front door to face the 'chee muis' head on!
We previously engaged a 'tai kam ye' ... a role usually played by an elderly lady who will guide us through the entire ceremony, proclaiming auspicious phrases etc. and to add the 'oomph' factor to the wedding celebration. Ours however, is a young chap instead ... and a bitchy one too I might add. Haha. YC was the appointed 'chief heng tai' and he kicked off the 'battle' with a very loud GOOD MORNING. You really have to know YC personally to believe how loud this little guy can be ... he's literally a walking loud speaker.
We had to pass a few tests in order to gain entry and claim the bride. Wrong answers or failures would warrant us to pay a price ... literally. Test no.1 was to source for the main 5 ingredients used in the Chinese cultural daily lives and we were only given 10 minutes to obtain it. The only clue given was that all the items were edible. ML knew the answer to this one ... we needed oil, rice, vinegar, salt and sugar. With the five empty bowls provided, he hurried to SY's neighbour and rang the door bell. *Ding Dong* and thankfully the neighbour was most obliging. Within minutes, we got what we wanted and presented it to the chee muis but alas, we were told not all of our 'answers' were right and so, kena 'saman'. Apparently, 'oil' wasn't one of the five ingredients ... excuse being oil is not edible. YC quickly 'proved' to them that it is and proceeded to drink the oil. Wahseh!!! Then CJ kena punish by brushing his teeth with a dollop of wasabi instead of regular toothpaste. Where to find heng tais like these man. :D
The second test came in the form of a quiz. 5 questions all together ... all concerning the bride. Her finger size la, which of her toe is the longest la, her worst fear la, what she detest eating la etc. After a few more 'samans', we went on to the next test. Four type of liquid concoctions were given (sour, sweet, bitter and spicy) ... and we were supposed to down 'em all. *Gulp yucks gulp yucks gulp yucks gulp yucks* .... nevertheless, we accomplished it ... no problemo.
Finally, it came to the part where we had to dish out the BIG ang pows to 'bribe' our way in. At first I gave them a 'huge' one. Hehe ... the day before I went to colour photocopy a couple of RM50 notes. Looks really authentic yo. They were fooled for a while I guess ... until they felt the paper quality. Haha ... more negotiations ensued, we tried everything ... stating that further delays would result in us being late for the church ceremony but the chee muis were stone- willed on getting my money. So no choice la ... have to fork the moolah out.
Once inside, I was given about 10 tissue papers ... each with a 'kiss' lipstick marking on it and was told to identify the one belonging to SY. It was tough and after pondering for a bit, I made my first guess. I was told it was wrong ... so punishment time. One of my heng tai had to do 5 push ups with 4 other guys piled on top of him. Kevin offered to perform this task and he did it with relative ease. Wonder if he managed to catch any of the single ladies' eyes with his machoness. Kekeke.
After this, we were finally permitted to head upstairs. Once there, we tried barging in. It was chaotic man ... so many people trying to power their way through the doorway. We pushed and they resisted. :) So we 'compromised' ... just another simple test we were told. We agreed and the door was opened.
The view that greeted me was like no other. Everything else was a blur and I couldn't take my eyes of her. Sitting there elegantly in her beautiful wedding gown, SY does indeed looked very much like a princess you so often read in fairytales.
I'm one lucky guy indeed.
Once inside, I was told to go on bended knee and to profess my love by saying 'I Love You' ... in ten different languages ... andddd English is not accepted yo. Hence without wasting any time, I started ... from the Malay language to Hokkien, Hakka, Japanese, Korean, African etc. I got stuck at no.8 but thankfully, Alban managed to connect to the web on his Iphone and googled. We were then equiped with hundreds of 'I love you's in every possible language known to man. Haha.
I rose to my feet and this was when the sneaky chee muis told me that it wasn't over yet. They hid one of the bride's shoes 'somewhere' inside the room and I had to find it. Derick, another one of my heng tais immediately told me to look beneath the chair the bride is sitting on. I guessed he must've played this game before cause it was exactly where he said it was. :)
Finally, I managed to successfully claim my bride, I took her by the hand and we exchanged a beautiful li'll kiss to seal the deal ... *bliss*
To be continued ...
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